You!
by sandstar08
Summary: Rose is slightly angry about something. What did the Doctor do this time?


Title: A Conversation Before  
Gift for: imsanehonest  
Pairing: Doctor/Rose with a little Harkness flirting  
Rating: PG  
Warnings: Excessive fluffiness, and newbie author

Spoilers: Nope, this goes back to season 1  
Beta: All hail misssigma, who is amazingly fast and incredibly patient with authors who procrastinate  
Summary: The TARDIS Trio have a conversation about dancing and panties, not necessarily in that order.

"You!" Rose shouted furiously when she saw a pair of black pants coming out from underneath the main console of the TARDIS, "I can't believe you did this!"

"What's wrong, Rose?" The Doctor had his trademark "I'm a maniac but I'm an adorably bald alien genius maniac" grin on when his face finally appeared out of the electronic hodgepodge of wires.

"Doctor!"

"Rose!" The Doctor mimicked her surprise, gracefully popping up to his feet and casually zapping away oil spots on his leather jacket with the sonic screwdriver, "What's wrong? You don't sound too happy-" He froze, eyes wide and eyebrows raised, at the black lace panties in Rose's right hand, "Rose. You know, if there's something you'd like to tell me, you don't need to hold panties to catch my attention."

Rose blushed as she hid the aforementioned undergarments behind her back, "Oh no, Doctor. It's not you. It's-"

"Ow! That hurt!" The Doctor scolded his sonic screwdriver.

"Doctor…"

"Yes, Rose?"

"Why are you talking to your sonic screwdriver?"

"Well, it burned a hole into my jacket, and you know I just got this one cleaned on Tarsius before that proto-humanoid Gloobi hybrid decided it wanted to try blonde hair on human for dessert."

"Yes, well, if I remember correctly, we did a lot more running on that planet than we did shopping. And you still haven't taken me to Arkannis Major to replace my muddy shoes like you promised."

"I promised you I'd take you to Arkannis Major if we didn't have to stop in to see Jackie and Mickey the Idiot. We saw them, ergo I don't have to take you."

"When did we see Mum? And stop calling my- Mickey an idiot!"

"We saw your wonderful Mum the same day that you decided to corrupt time and save your dad. Forget the large flying grey things? They tried to eat people…"

"That doesn't count! Mum didn't even know it was me until the very end! And she certainly didn't remember it!"

"We saw them. And that's about as much Jackie as I can handle for a while. Woman didn't even know me, and she already hated me."

"Well, what about those chips and crisps you owe me? You still haven't paid me back. Or taken me out on that date."

"What did you think the Charles Dickens trip was then? A bite to eat?"

"But you didn't even get dressed up!"

"And judging from the way that you're poking me with black panties, I'm guessing you blame me for that rift we sealed as well."

"But- I- You- JACK!" A shrill voice displayed the echoing properties of a spaceship that happened to be bigger on the inside.

"Aww… did Rosie not like the little present I left her?" An American accent drawled behind the red-faced arguing couple.

"Harkness!" Rose spun around angrily, throwing the panties at him.

"Woah, woah, slow down blondie. I'd rather take those off myself." Jack said as he took the lacy lingerie off his face, "Thanks for the offer, though. I'll keep it mind the next time you want to dance."

"There'll be no dancing of any sort on my ship."

"And why not?" Jack asked the grumpy alien with a mischievous I-know-you-like-her glance at Rose.

"Yeah. Why not?" Rose demanded, moving closer to stiff alien statue the Doctor had suddenly become, "Don't you like dancing, Doctor? You were pretty good last night."

"He danced with you last night?" Jack demanded.

"I danced with you last night?"

"Of course he did, Jack. Don't you remember? You were standing right there."

"I was WHAT?!" 

"While we danced to Glen Miller?"

"Oh! That…" The two men echoed.

"Not that he was really dancing, of course. Just sort of shuffling his feet."

"Now that's just a shame, Rose. You know what you need? A real man who can show you how to really dance until you drop. Preferably into bed."

"I'm not about to be insulted by two stupid apes in my own ship. I am the Doctor, and –"

"Yeah, yeah, we know, we know. What's that next line, Jack?"

Jack cleared his throat and announced in a deep, booming voice that echoed throughout the room: "He is the Lord of Time!"

"And Space!" The Doctor piped in, slightly disgruntled when his companions began to laugh, "The TARDIS travels through both Time and Space."

"With capital letters?" Rose asked, sharing a knowing grin with Jack.

"Capital letters?"

"Never mind, Doctor. It's just an old ape joke. Too simplistic for someone who travels through Time and Space," Jack assured him.

"Hey!" Rose suddenly stopped giggling at the baffled alien and glared at the two men again, "Nice try, Jack, but I'm not about to forgive you for your prank just like that."

"I'm sorry, Rose, sweetheart. Honestly, I'd just forgotten all about it. Look, no harm done, eh?" Jack moved over to give Rose a hug.

"Apology accepted, Jack." Rose sighed as she rolled her eyes at the childish grin on Jack's face. "Just don't do that again, all right?" She said as she reached out to him.

"Fantastic!" The Doctor's shout startled both companions as he grabbed Rose's outstretched hand and pulled her to the other side of the console.

"What's fantastic, Doctor?"

"We've arrived! I love this place!"

"Where are we?" questioned a slightly disgruntled captain from the 51st century who still wanted that hug and had noticed that the Doctor still hadn't let go of Rose's hand.

"And slightly more interestingly, when are we?" Rose asked.

The Doctor strutted over to the entrance and leaned casually against the doorframe of the TARDIS, grinning at the two humans. "Welcome," he declared, "to Woman Wept, 4999."

Rose poked him in the chest before she grabbed his hand and pulled him out the door, "If I get my new shoes muddy because we're on the run again, it's your fault, Doctor."

As Jack grabbed his trench coat, he called after the Time Lord and his plus one, "Don't worry, Rose. If you get anything muddy, I'd love to help you clean up afterwards."


End file.
